“Leave the broken, irreversible past in God’s hands, and step out into the invincible future with Him.” – Oswald Chambers
Dead. No pulse. The heart has stopped. No beat. These are the marks of a dead person. The sheet is pulled over the head, and the death certificate filled out. An individual is no longer living among us.
However, there are dead people actually walking among us. No, I am not talking about zombies. They are people who have no heartbeat. They have no emotions. Inside they are cold and dead, yet they live feeling nothing and do not give what the heart should give… trust and love.
There are many of us that remember when our “death certificate” was filled out. We remember when we no longer loved and no longer trusted. We became the walking dead.
However, there is hope that our hearts can beat again.
When we live as dead, we feel insane. We feel the darkness close in. We feel the demons of our pasts tear at our flesh, and bind us to the tombs of the events that left us dead.
In fact, a man literally lived this out. He was possessed by demons. He was chained to tombs outside the city. He was tormented beyond belief. All around him was death and darkness. Yet, in Mark 5:1-20, Jesus steps in. Jesus confronts the man. The man says, “What have you to do with me?” He was known as the madman. No one wanted to be around him. Jesus wanted to be around him. He knew this man’s torment. He knew how this man cut himself to get away from the torment of the demons. And, Jesus wanted to be around this man.
The light and life of Jesus cast out the demons and were drowned out of this man’s life. Yet, something is said in Mark 5:15. The man’s sanity was restored. His heart began to beat again, and he could think and be calm because of Jesus. He came to Jesus naked and insane, and Jesus healed and clothed him.
He wants to do that for us. When we have experienced trauma and abuse we are dead inside facing the torments of the past. Yet, Jesus wants to heal us and restore our sanity.
One of the worst things that happens to us is when trust is broken. We no longer trust people to get close to us. We push them away. If anyone tries to help, we hold them in suspicion waiting for them to hurt us; expecting them to.
A woman placed her trust in doctors. She spent all her money. She was an outcast because her condition. She was unclean. Nothing worked, and she felt hopeless. She couldn’t trust anyone to heal her. Yet, she heard about Jesus. A small spark of trust set a thought in her heart, “What if I could just touch the hem of his garment?” In Mark 5:25-24, we see what happens.
She trusts. She pushes her all to get through the crowd to just touch Jesus. There was something about Jesus she could trust. She touched him, and was immediately healed. When called to Jesus, she came out of the crowd afraid he would hurt her. Would her trust be broken again? Jesus said to her, “Daughter, your faith has saved you. Go in peace and be healed from your affliction.” He called her “daughter.” She was safe to trust him to heal her. Her heart began to beat again.
Our hurt causes us not to trust. We wall off our lives, build the mote, and ready the cannons in case someone gets too close. We won’t make that mistake again. Just like this woman, we have trusted time and time again only to be let down. Yet, with Jesus there is a spark of trust. We can trust and reach for him. He doesn’t reject us. He calls us “my son and my daughter.” He wants us to reach for him, because in that action our hearts begin to beat again, and trust can be restored.
Have you ever been vulnerable with someone and been broken into a million pieces? Have you ever loved someone and gave them your heart only to be used? After those experiences you feel dirty and untouchable. You feel like you have to avoid people, you can’t be apart of the community anymore. You are going to the well alone.
John 4:1-42 tells the story of a heartbroken woman going to the well alone. She had many husbands. She gave her heart into relationships only to be broken. Her value became about her body and how well she could please a man. Her heart wanted to love, but she didn’t allow her heart to beat with love. That is until she was offered living water. Jesus offered her living water that would spring up into a fountain to refresh her heart and let it beat again. She accepted it. She was healed and could love people again. She loved people so much that she didn’t offer her body, she offered to show the mended and beating heart of love that Jesus restored.
In our lives, we have been heartbroken. We have offered ourselves and only been betrayed. We don’t love people. Instead, we buy our friends, we offer pictures of our bodies or sexual experiences, we do anything to fit in and win the affections of people. But, in reality, Jesus sees this and offers us living water. We do not need those things, because we can be mended and our hearts can beat again. Love can be restored. Jesus loved you so much to have his heart beat ceased so your heart could beat again with his love.
Tell Your Heart To Beat Again
I remember when my death certificate was signed. I remember when my heart stopped. I remember when I swore I would not love or trust again. I remember those events too well – the guys who sexually took advantage of me, the jokes and mocking comments over my body, the ridicule of my interests, the degrading of me not being a man. I remember when I died. I lost my sanity, my trust, and my love. I was driven to think suicidal thoughts and actually try. I thought actual death could revive my dead heart.
But, my story follows another story in the Bible: Mark 2:1-12. I was just laying on my mat emotionally and spiritually a wreck. I gave my trust to many people to be betrayed. I gave my vulnerability only to be broken. On my death certificate there are many signatures. Yet, some men saw my state. They knew I couldn’t get to Jesus by myself. They knew my heart would not beat again without Jesus. And just like the paralytic, it is through the people God put in my life to cause my heart to beat again. In fact, I am able to say I forgive those who hurt me, abused me, laughed at me, mocked me, and betrayed me. Jesus did this through people.
Many times we go back to the people who hurt us trying to get what they should have given us, but refused. Instead, we need to turn to the people God has brought in our lives to help our hearts beat again. Who are the Tonys, the Rogers, the Sarahs, the Travis, the Lisas, the Tims, the Rachels, the Peters, the Helgas, the Berthas, the… whatever their name is. Are you willing to let them love you and trust they will carry you straight to the one who can heal you?
We can tell our hearts to beat again. We can breathe in the grace of Jesus, because he wants to heal us. He wants us to love and trust. It is difficult to let go of the past. But, are we willing to reach out to Jesus?
Do you like being dead? Do you like having a cold heart? How many people have you pushed away and lashed out at because of your dead heart?
The only way to tell your heart to beat again is to give it to the one who gives the blood to pump through your heart: Jesus. He gives you life, and he gives new life and a new heart. II Corinthians 5:17 promises all things are made new – including your broken and dead heart.
Jesus loves you so much that he gave his heartbeat to be ceased so your’s could beat with passionate love and trust. In Jesus, we are no longer where we were. We are never defined by are past. We are a new creation.
The past hurts. However, your death certificate can be torn up. You can be all that God wants you to be. You just have to reach out to where he is leading. He only offers healing to your broken heart.
Jesus healed you at the cross, and you can tell your heart to beat again.
Please listen after reading – Tell Your Heart To Beat Again by Danny Gokey
2 thoughts on “Beat Again”
This is a wonderful entry. It speaks volumes about where you are on your journey and I am SO very happy to be witness to your progress. In many ways, I have gone and am still going through this journey of resuscitating my heart. I am encouraged. Thank you for sharing.
Stephen, what a wonderful post! I can definitely SEE the progress in your walk. You are learning to love and trust like never before. Personally this is an encouragement to me because I myself am also still on the journey of resuscitating this part of my heart. I am learning to once again let the body of Christ join and support me. Thank you for this heartfelt and honest post.